Wednesday, February 5, 2020

->50M BC


Octopus
Insect
Frog
Turtle
Dinosaur
Crab
Spider
Salamander
Grass
Praying Mantis
Bumblebee Bat
Blue whale
Desert Mole rats
Snake
300,000,000 BC- 50,000,000 BC


Octopus (300,000,000 BC)

In my next life, I was an animal with 2 eyes and 4 pairs of arms with suction cups, no bones and a large brain. I lived in the ocean. I had a relatively short life expectancy, living for only 6 months. Larger species some having an arm span of up to 5 meters were able to live up to 5 years. I had a beak similar in shape to a parrot's beak. It was the only hard part of my body. We ate crabs, worms, and other mollusks such as clams. Some of us ate fish. We usually injected our prey with paralyzing saliva before dismembering it into small pieces with our beaks. 
some music....
Having 3 hearts, we were very emotional. Our blood contained a copper-rich protein that was more efficient for transporting oxygen in cold conditions and low oxygen pressures than the iron-rich hemoglobin of vertebrates. This protein dissolved in the plasma and gave our blood a bluish color and it also gave our egos a noble and somewhat arrogant feeling. After all, we were highly intelligent, more so than any other order of invertebrates. 



Scientists, who evolved 300 million years after us, confirmed our intelligence with maze and problem-solving experiments that showed evidence of a memory system that stored both short- and long-term memory. We were able to distinguish between different shapes and patterns and we learned by observing. These clever scientists built aquariums to observe and study us. Because our arms were so flexible, we were able to break out of our aquariums and break into other aquariums that had food. 



The scientists were really impressed by our abilities. They observed some of us collect discarded coconut shells, manipulate and reassemble them to use as shelters. From this, they concluded to their great surprise that we could use tools. Because we were regarded as so clever, scientists gave us special rights that the other less intelligent animals didn't have. "Cruelty to animals" legislation was written to protect us and only us from any experimental surgery without first being anesthetized. Because we died before we could raise and educate our kids ourselves, they had to learn everything for themselves. Probably that was the reason we grew up so clever. 



Our main defense was to hide, either not to be seen at all, or to change our skin color as a camouflage. We were able to mimic other more dangerous animals, such as lionfish, sea snakes and eels. Once we had been seen by a predator, we made a fast escape and when we couldn't swim fast enough, we ejected a thick, blackish ink in a large cloud so that the annoying predators couldn't see and smell us. Some of us learned to crawl out of the water for a short period to escape predators. Failing that, we shed one or more of our arms leaving them wiggling to distract and elude the predator's grasp. Later we regenerated new arms to replace those we shed. 



We were dying to reproduce. The men inserted their packet of sperm into waiting vaginas with their third right arm which was hopefully fully regenerated if it had been detached. The ladies kept our sperm alive inside them for weeks until their eggs were mature. Then they fertilized the 200,000 or so eggs and laid them in the sand. We had an excellent sense of touch. Our suction cups were equipped with chemo-receptors so that we were able to taste whatever we were touching. Having 8 arms, we were so worn out after our lovemaking that we died shortly after. The men died after a few months while the ladies hung in there a bit longer to take care of their children. Shortly after their eggs hatched, they spent one month babysitting. Our lovemaking apparently put the ladies in such a deep trance that they forgot to eat during this time and died of starvation. 

I was born with 6 legs and 2 antennae. I was one of the first animals to fly in the air. I was a pioneer. All animals before me lived in water or on land until I developed wings that allowed me to fly high in the air. I found mates to mate with and laid my eggs in water to grow into insects to repeat the life-cycle. Some of us grew only about a millimeter long, but not all were so small. After many generations, over many millions of years, we soon covered the earth, from the deepest tunnels to the highest mountains. We became the most diverse groups of animals on the planet forming many millions of different species and representing more than half of all known living organisms. We were found in nearly all environments, although only a small number of us resided in the oceans. Some of us lived only a day, but others could live a few years. Most of us were solitary, but some, such as bees, ants and termites were social and lived in large, well-organized families called colonies. We communicated with each other in a variety of ways. Some used chemicals while others used sound and others still used light. We were essential to the life-cycle of many flowering plants which evolve with us and which most organisms who came along long after us, including humans, depended on for food. 

I was born a cockroach.

I was born a pest. We were among the most primitive living insects and among the hardiest insects, being able to survive up to 3 months without food, 4 weeks without water and 45 minutes without air. When humans evolved 300 millions of years later, we lived with them wherever they lived. We liked their warm houses, the delicious snacks they left in their garbage and in their kitchens. We preferred dark to light and whenever they turned on the light, we scattered back to our dark hiding places. Without them knowing, we became their very first domesticated animals. 

We left behind chemical trails in our shit for our family and friends to follow us to any sources of food and water we happened to find. We cooperated and made agreements as a group regarding resource allocation which other creatures, like man, preferred to compete and fight over. We communicated with airborne chemicals that we emitted for swarming and mating. We taught and learned from each other. 

Our ladies carried about 40 thin eggs in purses on the end of their abdomens. The eggs hatched from the combined pressure of the hatchlings gulping air. Once hatched, the nymphs continued inflating themselves with air, becoming harder within 4 hours. Development from eggs to adults took 3-4 months. The females produced up to 8 egg cases in a lifetime and could produce 300 - 400 offspring. We used airborne chemicals to attract mates, and the males practiced courtship rituals, such as posturing and producing sounds by rubbing together certain body parts. We mated facing away from each other bum to bum with our genitalia in contact, and our copulation was prolonged. 

A few ladies practice asexual reproduction techniques producing clones and had no need for males to fertilize their eggs. The females usually attached their egg case to a substrate, or inserted it into a suitably protective crevice, or carried it about until just before the eggs hatched. The nymphs were similar to the adults, except for undeveloped wings and genitalia. Development took a few months to over a year and once they were adults, they could live up to the ripe old age of 4 years.

One evening as I was minding my own business looking for a mate, I was killed by a newly evolved creature called a “frog” who had a very long and fast lashing tongue. 

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Frog (250,000,000 BC)
Once there were a lot of insects crawling and flying around, the next thing I wanted to be was an amphibian able to live in water and on land. I chose to be born a frog which had very recently evolved. I hatched from an egg into a limbless larva with gills, commonly known as a tadpole. After further growth, during which I developed limbs and lungs, I underwent metamorphosis in which my appearance and internal organs were rearranged. This metamorphosis typically lasted only a day. After this I was able to leave the water as a miniature, air-breathing frog. We lived from the tropics to subarctic regions. Tropical rain-forests were our favorite hangout. Besides living in fresh water and on dry land, some of the adults lived underground or in trees. Those of us with warts, which were concentrations of glandular toxins on our skins, were affectionately called toads. Our skins varied in color from well-camouflaged black, brown, gray, green and had vivid patterns of bright reds or yellows to advertise toxicity to warn away predators.

We ate small invertebrates such as insects, worms, clams, crabs, snails and starfish. A few of the larger ones ate fish, other frogs and small mammals once they evolved. Some of us used our sticky tongues to catch fast-moving prey, while others stuffed food into their mouths with their hands. A few of us were vegetarians and fed on fruit. We were extremely efficient at converting what we ate into body mass, which made us an important food source for predators like bullfrogs and large birds, fish, large salamanders, snakes and mammals once these creatures evolved.

Our skin was semi-permeable, making us susceptible to dehydration, so we lived in moist places. Our skin absorbed water and helped control body temperature. We shed our skin every few weeks. It usually split down the middle of the back and across the belly, and we pulled our arms and legs free and worked it towards the head. Then we ate it. Being cold-blooded, we had to adopt suitable behavior patterns to regulate our temperature. To warm up, we moved into the sun or onto a warm surface. When and if we overheated, we moved into the shade or adopted a stance that exposed the minimum area of skin to the air. During extreme conditions, whether hot, dry or cold, some of us remained inactive for months. Many hibernated in winter. Those that lived on land dug burrows to lie dormant. Others, less proficient at digging, buried themselves in dead leaves. Some sank to the bottom of the pond and lay semi-immersed in mud but still able to access the oxygen dissolved in the water. Their metabolism slowed down and they lived on their energy reserves. Some survived by being frozen. Ice crystals formed under their skin and in the body cavity but the essential organs were protected from freezing by a high concentration of glucose. 

We practiced two main types of reproduction. One was prolonged and the other explosive. Most practiced the prolonged type. Prolonged breeders assembled at a pond, lake or stream to breed during the breeding season. Many returned to the bodies of water in which they developed as larvae. This often resulted in annual migrations involving thousands of individuals. Males usually arrived at the breeding site first and remained there for some time, whereas females tended to arrive later and depart soon after they had spawned. This meant that males outnumbered females at the water's edge and defended territories from which they expelled other males. They advertised their presence by calling, often alternating their croaks with neighboring frogs. Larger, stronger males tended to have deeper calls and maintained higher quality territories. Females selected their mates on the basis of the depth of their calls. Some males who had no territory did not call but laid in ambush to intercept females approaching a calling male. 

Explosive breeders arrived at breeding sites in response to certain trigger factors such as rainfall occurring in an arid area. Mating and spawning took place promptly and the speed of larval growth was rapid in order to make use of the pools before they dried up. The first male that found a suitable breeding location, such as a temporary pool, called loudly and others of both sexes converged on the pool. They called in unison creating a chorus that was heard far away. Mate selection and courtship was not as important as speed in reproduction. In some years, suitable conditions may not have occurred and the frogs may have gone on for two or more years without breeding. Some female toads only spawned half of the available eggs at a time, retaining some in case a better reproductive opportunity came later. At the breeding site, the males mounted the females and griped them tightly round the body. Typically this took place in the water. The females released their eggs and the males covered them with their sperm. 

My two testicles were attached to my kidneys and sperm passed into the kidneys. I didn't have a penis and neither did any of my brothers. I ejected my sperm directly onto the eggs as the females laid them. When I found a female to mate with, I climbed on her back and wrapped my fore limbs round her body and held this position for several days. For luck I developed special pads on my thumbs in the breeding season to give me a firm hold. My grip stimulated the ladies to release their eggs, usually wrapped in jelly. I was smaller and slimmer than the ladies and croaked very loud during the breeding season. We produced a wide range of vocalizations, particularly in the breeding season, and exhibited many different kinds of complex behaviors to attract mates, to fend off predators and to generally survive. 

Then without warning, comets of all sizes started to rain down from the sky. The mountains opened and spewed out their lava flows, Fire falling down from the sky and shooting up from the ground suddenly changed the climate for the worst. This was the Earth's most severe extinction event, with up to 96% of all marine species and 70% of terrestrial vertebrate species becoming extinct. It was called the "Great Dying Extinction". Because so much biodiversity was lost, the recovery of life on Earth took 10 million years, significantly longer than after any other extinction event. I was one of the luckier ones that survived and lived to a very old age of 10 years. 


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Turtle (215,000,000 BC)

I was born with my house on my back. I was one of the first reptiles. I was a cold blooded pioneer. We lived all over the world; in the seas, in the rivers, in ponds and on land. Despite that we lived in and around water; we breathed air and were born from eggs in nests found on dry land. We came in sizes varying from 8cm to 2m long. My extinct ancestors were even bigger reaching a length of nearly 5m. We were slow, sturdy, easygoing, patient, and wise creatures with long lifespans. 



Females deposited large numbers of eggs in holes dug into mud or sand. They covered and left them to incubate by themselves, and then they left. Whether we were born male or female depended on the incubation temperature of our eggs. A higher temperature produced females, a lower temperature produced males. When we hatched, we squirmed our way to the surface and headed toward the water to start our own lives. Our mom was long gone by then. We took many years to reach breeding age and mated only every couple of years. Because of longevity genes in our genome, our organs did not gradually break down nor did they become less efficient over time, like what happened with all the other animals and plants. 



We were very affectionate, especially when we mated. We were slow and preferred to get acquainted with our mates by spending time together. We liked to rub up against each other and show other signs of affection, like making clicking sounds and flirting and swimming around each other like we were dancing. Once we were comfortable with each other, a male mounted his lady from behind, grabbed on to her shell with his claws, twisted his tail around her tail and romantically bit her head to turn her on. Then we copulated. After the males ejaculated, the females held on to our sperm for quite a while before using it to fertilize their eggs. But that was not the end. The males stay on top of the females for as long as an hour, probably because they fell asleep. When the time was right, the females fertilized their eggs with the sperms they stored. 



The baby turtles usually spent about a month in their eggs, feeding off the yolk. Then they pecked their way out like birds and started heading toward the water to look for their moms and start their own lives. Our moms did not defend their nests from predators and did not assist the hatchlings to water. If they made the trek at night they had the best chance for survival. 


As I was just reaching the shore, a big ugly salamander zipped by and tried to eat me. I was able to hide in my shell but I was too afraid to come out. It was an extremely hot day and I fell asleep, dehydrated and died.


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Dinosaur (200,000,000 BC)
I was born from an egg that hatched in a nest. I survive and found mates to mate with. We were like kings and we roamed the earth in great flocks. All animals before me were small relative to me. We grew so big that no other animal could kill and eat us. We evolved to many different kinds of dinosaurs. Some could swim while others ran and even flew. Some dinosaurs grew more than 50m long and almost 10m high. But not all grew to be so big; some were no bigger than a meter. After many generations over many millions of years, dinosaurs ended up all over the world and became the dominant animals for 130 million years.

And then a very large comet hit the earth and 70% of all species were killed. Most of the large dinosaurs were eliminated, leaving mammals with little terrestrial competition. A few of us small fries who survived eventually evolved into birds.


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Crab (200,000,000 BC)
I was born with 8 legs and 2 claws. I was born a crab. I was covered with a thick exoskeleton, composed primarily of calcium carbonate, and armed with a single pair of claws. We were found in all of the world's oceans and many of us lived in fresh water and on land, particularly in tropical regions. We varied in size from a few millimeters to 4m wide.

We were either male or female. The males often had larger claws and females often had broader abdomens. We attracted mates by farting chemicals, waving our claws, making sounds or just making vibrations by shaking around. Once we found our suitable mates, we copulated belly-to-belly. Females stored sperm for a long time before using it to fertilize their eggs. Once fertilized, they released the eggs onto the abdomen below the tail flap, and secured them with a sticky material where they were protected during embryonic development. When development was complete, the newly-hatched larvae were released into the water, where they formed part of the plankton. The release was often timed with the tides. The free-swimming tiny larvae floated and took advantage of water currents and lived off the yolk of the egg. The growing larvae continually molted their outer skin or shell until they sank to the bottom.

Free from our old shell, we were extremely soft and hid in holes and crevasses until our new shells hardened. We could walk sideways, forwards or backwards, and could swim. We communicated by drumming or waving our claws. We fought among ourselves, over mates and even over the holes and crevices we hid in. We were omnivores, eating plants, animals, algae and fungi. During mating season, we both looked and found comfortable spot for the eggs and worked together to provide food and protection for our family.

I died a natural death at the old age of 20 years.


I was born with 8 legs and 8 eyes. I had a fang to inject venom into anyone who threatened me. I was very abundant all over the world and lived on every land except Antarctica. I did not have any antennae, nor did I have any muscles in my limbs. I used hydraulic pressure to move my legs. I had up to six types of silk glands within my abdomen that extruded silk to make webs. My webs varied widely in size, shape and the amount of sticky thread used. Some of us were less than 0.4mm in body length when fully grown. Others like tarantulas had body lengths up to 9cm and leg spans up to 25cm.

I was a predator, mostly preying on insects and on other spiders, although a few of my larger relatives preferred to eat birds and lizards. We used a wide range of strategies to capture our prey: trapping it in sticky webs, lassoing it with swinging sticky blobs at the end of our webs, or mimicking the prey to avoid detection. Most of us detected our prey by sensing vibrations, but the active hunters had acute vision. Many showed signs of intelligence in their choice of tactics and the ability to develop new ones. Our guts were too narrow to take solids, so we liquidized our food by soaking it with digestive enzymes and grinding it till it was a mush.

Females wove silk egg-cases, each of which contained hundreds of eggs. Once the eggs hatched, many moms cared for their young by carrying them around and sharing food with them. Some of us were social, building communal webs that housed up to 50,000 individuals. Social behavior ranged from toleration to co-operative hunting and food-sharing.

Our silk provided a combination of lightness, strength and elasticity that was superior to that of the synthetic materials that were available 200 million years later. Our silk was mainly composed of a protein very similar to that used in silk made by insects. It was initially a liquid and hardened not by exposure to air but as a result of being drawn out, which changed the internal structure of the protein. It was similar in tensile strength to synthetic nylon or biological materials such as chitin, collagen or cellulose, but much more elastic. It could be stretched much further before it broke or lost its shape. Even those who did not build webs to catch prey used silk in several ways: to wrap their sperm and their fertilized eggs; or to use as a "safety rope" when they were building their nest. We reproduced sexually but unfortunately we did not copulate. The boys did not ejaculate inside their ladies but instead on a Kleenex made from their silk.

The boys identified themselves by a variety of complex courtship rituals. Some drummed a recognizable beat on their beds of webs. Others touched their ladies and hypnotized them. If courtship was successful, the sperm on the Kleenex ended up being wiped into the vaginas of the ladies. We were dying to make love to them. Many ladies were so hungry that they killed and ate us after they got our sperm. In many cases the males co-operated by trying to impale themselves on the females' fangs. Some lived for a while in their mates' webs before allowing themselves to be eaten. Some of the more coward males mated with newly molted females who were too weak to be a threat. The females stored our sperm and release it when they were ready. They laid up to 3000 eggs in one or more silk egg sacs which maintained a fairly constant humidity level.

The babies passed all their larval stages inside the eggs and hatched as very small and sexually immature but similar in shape to the adults. Some mothers cared for their young, letting them cling on their back. They respond to the "begging" of their hungry young by giving them their prey, provided the prey was no longer struggling. Others regurgitated their food to feed their young.

Some of us were very clever and mimicked ants to protect themselves from being eaten by predators preying on spiders. Some also mimicked ants to prey on other spiders or to prey on the caterpillars that some ants domesticated, herded and milked for honeydew. The ant-mimicking spiders waved their front pair of legs to mimic antennae and to conceal the fact that they had 8 legs. Some developed large color patches around one pair of their 8 simple eyes to mimic the two compound eyes of ants. Some covered their bodies with reflective hairs to resemble the shiny bodies of ants. Others modified their behavior to resemble ants by walking in a zig-zag pattern or walking on the outer edges of leaves, just like how the ants walked. Most of us lived for only 1 or 2 years, although some tarantulas lived 10 times longer than that.


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Salamander (165,000,000 BC)
I was an amphibian with a lizard like appearance, having a slender body, short nose, and long tail. My moist skin usually made me reliant on habitats in or near water, or under moist ground, often in a wetland. We were unique in that we were the only vertebrates capable of regenerating lost limbs, as well as other body parts. Some of us had a neat trick to escape predators. Our tail dropped off as if from pure fright and it wriggled around for a little while as if alive. Then we either ran away or stayed so very still so as not be noticed by the predator who got distracted by our trick. We were then able to grow a new tail in a few short weeks. We could also regrow the lens and the retina of our eyes. We caught our prey by rapidly extending our sticky tongues which adhered to the prey. Then we pulled it along with whatever it caught into our hungry mouth. We were very similar to frogs and toads.


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Grass (140,000,000 BC)
I was born a plant with flowers, seeds, roots and with a vascular system to transport water. I was one of the most versatile land plants. We all had narrow leaves growing from our base. We adapted to grow in almost every terrestrial habitat. Some of the places we grew were lush rain forests, dry deserts, cold mountains, salt-marshes, reed swamps and steppes. We were the most widespread plants and a valuable source of food and energy for all kinds of animals. We had many different forms and names. We made the earth ready for the many life forms that evolved many millions of years after us. We were used as grain for eating, sprouting, and drinking. We were also used to make paper, clothing, insulation, and baskets. Many animals such as cattle, sheep, horses, rabbits, grasshoppers, caterpillars and man ate us and our seeds as their main food source.


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Praying Mantis (120,000,000 BC)
My closest relatives were cockroaches. We were commonly known as "praying mantis" because of the typical "prayer-like" posture with folded fore-limbs. We were sometimes confused with grasshoppers, crickets and insects that looked just like sticks and leaves. We preyed on insects hunting them with various methods.

Most of us ambushed our prey. We camouflage ourselves and spent long periods standing perfectly still waiting for our prey to stray within reach. Once they strayed close enough, we lashed out at remarkable speed to capture them. We then griped them with grasping spiked forelegs and held them with one arm between the head and thorax, and the other on the abdomen like we were wrestlers. If the prey did not resist, we ate it alive. If the prey did resist, we ate its head first and sliced and chewed its body till there was nothing left. Some of us actively pursued our prey like a tiger.

Generally, we protected ourselves by camouflage and concealment. When spotted, we stood tall and spread our forelegs with our wings fanning out wide. The fanning of the wings made us seem larger and more threatening. When we were harassed, we struck with our forelegs and attempted to pinch or bite and we produced a hissing sound. When we heard the echoes of bats flying around, we immediately stopped flying and dove in a spiral toward the safety of the ground making acrobatic loops and spins just in case the bats were giving chase. 

Like praying monks that evolved 20 million years later, we rocked back and forth side-to-side to mimic vegetation moving in the wind. This way we were able to discriminate objects from the background by their relative movement much better. We camouflaged ourselves by changing our color to blend in with the foliage or ground. We did this not only to avoid predators, but also to better snare our prey. Some of us evolved to look like withered leaves, sticks, tree barks, blades of grass, flowers, or even stones. We had a sharp bite but without venom. We had many predators who liked to eat insects. Among the many were bullfrogs and animals who evolved millions of years later, like owls, chameleons and snakes. If we were able to avoid being eaten, we lived for about a year.

Sexually we were one of the most sadomasochistic creatures that were ever created. Except for humans of course who came 120 million years after us. Sexual cannibalism was common among us. The females began the foreplay by biting off the heads of their men, as if we were just prey. This turned the men on and their movements and orgasms were very vigorous. Talking about giving head! We were highly visual organisms and when left alone, we had very elaborate courtship rituals. The males engaged the females in dance, as if to try to change their interest from feeding to mating. Then they prayed.

The reason for sexual cannibalism was to give submissive males a selective advantage to produce offspring. Males who ended up having their heads bitten off actually copulated as if they lost their heads, taking twice as long as those that kept their heads. Their chances of fertilizing the ladies were twice as high. The hungry ladies loved to eat their men and the men were dying to be eaten by the ladies. The act of dismounting was one of the most dangerous times for males during copulation, for it was at this time that females most frequently cannibalized their mates. No wonder the men didn't want to let go and hung on for dear life.

The males leapt onto the backs of the females and clasped their thorax and wing bases with their forelegs. Talking about foreplay! They then arched their abdomen to deposit and store sperm in a special chamber near the tip of the abdomen of the ladies. The females then lay between 10 and 400 eggs. Eggs were deposited in a frothy mass that was produced by glands in the abdomen. This froth then hardened, creating a protective capsule which was attached to a flat surface, wrapped around a plant or even deposited and buried in the ground. Some ladies guarded their eggs from predators.

We went through three stages of metamorphosis: egg, nymph, and adult. The nymphs and adults were structurally quite similar. The nymphs were smaller and had no wings or functional genitalia. The nymphs were also sometimes colored differently from the adults, and in their early stages, they often mimicked ants. Nymphs increased in size often changing their diet by replacing their outer body covering with a sturdy, flexible exoskeleton. They molted 5 -10 times. Nymphs had voracious appetites and cannibalized each other if they couldn't find an adequate supply of other small insects.



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Bumblebee Bat (100,000,000 BC)
When I was born a bumblebee bat, I was one of the smallest mammals ever to live. I was about 3cm long and looked like an over grown bee. I lived deep inside a limestone cave along a river near a forest with about 100 other bats like me. When it didn`t rain too hard or when it wasn`t too cold, I left my cave for about 30 minutes in the evening and at dawn to feed, foraging around nearby forests for insects. I had many brothers and sisters because my mother gave birth to one of us every year. I had very small eyes which were mostly concealed by fur. My mom said that it really did not matter much as we were all mostly blind anyways. To compensate for my useless eyes, I had a large pig-like snout with which I could smell things really well, and very large ears with which I could hear things very clearly. I made a very sharp sound and listened for echoes to see where I was flying.

Many millions of years later when men evolved to develop flying machines, they used this very same method called radar for navigating. I had large wings with long tips that allowed me to hover. My mother told me never to stay long on the ground because snakes really liked to eat us. I listened to her and died of old age when I was 30.


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Blue whale (55,000,000 BC)
Next I was born a blue whale and was one of the largest mammals ever to live. I was 30m long, 1000 times longer than a bumblebee bat. I was larger than the largest dinosaur but I had no feet to run on land so I had to stay and live in the ocean. Because we were the biggest, no other animals could kill us. There were very many of us swimming around. When man evolved and started to hunt and kill us for our fat to light his lanterns with, there were less and less of us, until we became nearly extinct, just like the dinosaurs.

Being a mammal, I drank milk when I was a baby. I weighed nearly 2500kg and was 7m long when I was born. During my first 7 months of life, I drank about 400 liters of milk every day becoming 90kg heavier each day. Being a mammal, I had to surface to breathe thru my blowholes on top of my head. I was a very fast swimmer, reaching speeds of 50 km/h for short distances. I lived alone for most my life until I found my partner whom I traveled with.

When I was 7 years old, I was considered a grown up, I was like a bear, feeding and breeding. In the winter we went south to the Antarctic to feed, feeding almost exclusively on krill, a crab like animals about 1cm long. Every day, each of us gorged on about 40 million krill weighing about 3600kg. We had to dive more than 100m to find the krill staying up to 30 minutes under water. For the winter we went up north for our vacation. Near the equator, I found a mate and made love all winter. My father proudly told me that even though our brain was relatively small, about 0.007% of our body weight, we had the largest penis of any animals. It was up to 3m long when erect. 


I died of old age when I was 80 years old.


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Desert Mole rats
I was born naked as a rat. I was known as a naked mole rat and also called a desert mole rat. I was a burrowing rodent mammal native to parts of East Africa. Like ants and bees, we had a social organization characterized by cooperative brood care and division of labor. We had castes like human societies had when they evolved many millions of years later. We had a highly unusual set of physical traits that enabled us to thrive in an otherwise extremely harsh underground environment. We were a bit cold blooded, being the only mammals that could have body temperatures within certain boundaries of ambient temperatures. We had very low metabolic and respiratory rates and lacked pain sensations on our skin.

Our eyes were quite small and we couldn't see so well. Our legs were thin and short. We were however highly adept at moving underground and we could move just as fast backward as forward. Our large protruding teeth were used to dig, and our lips were behind our teeth to prevent soil from filling our mouths while digging. About a quarter of our musculature was used in moving our jaws whilst we dug. We had very little hair and wrinkled pink or yellowish skin. We were well adapted for the limited availability of oxygen within our tunnels. Our lungs were very small and our blood had a very strong affinity for oxygen. In long periods of hunger, such as a drought, our metabolic rate decreased by up to 25%. Our family averaged 80 individuals and we lived together in complex systems of burrows stretching up to 5km in arid African deserts. Only our mom, the queen, and a couple of males which joined us from other families reproduced. The rest of the members were workers. The queen and breeding males were able to breed one year after being born. Workers were sterile. The smaller workers gathered food and maintained our nest while the larger ones protected it from invaders.

The relationships between our mother queen and the breeding males lasted for many years. Our queen lived about 15 years and was extremely hostile to her daughters. When she died, one of her daughters took her place after a violent struggle with her competing sisters. Gestation lasted about 70 days. Our mother had a litter of 3-12 blind pups once a year and she nursed them for the first month. After that, they were fed shit by the worker sisters until they were old enough to eat solid food. We ate very large tubers that we found deep underground while digging our tunnels. We also ate our own shit. A single tuber was large enough to provide our entire colony with enough food to last for months or even years. Symbiotic bacteria in our intestines fermented the fibers allowing otherwise indigestible cellulose to be turned into digestible fat.

I lived to a ripe old age of 28 and was killed by a snake while I was out having a leak.




I was born a snake. I was a legless, carnivorous reptile without ears or eyelids. My eyes were always open. I moved by creeping and crawling. I ate small animals including lizards, other snakes, small mammals, birds, eggs, fish, snails or insects. Because I could not bite or tear my food to pieces, I had to swallow them whole. I could swallow prey much larger than my head.

My paired organs such as kidneys appeared one in front of the other instead of side by side. I only had one functional lung. I lived on almost every continent except Antarctica, Ireland, Iceland and New Zealand. With over 3000 species we ranged in size from under 10cm to over 10m. Most of us were nonvenomous and killed our prey either by swallowing it alive or by squeezing it to death. Those of us who had venom used it primarily to immobilize and kill prey rather than for self-defense. 

I used smells to track my prey. I smelled by using my forked tongue to collect airborne particles, and then passed them to my mouth for examination. The fork in my tongue gave me a sort of directional sense of smell and taste simultaneously. I kept my tongue constantly in motion, sampling particles from the air, ground, and water, analyzing the chemicals found, and determining the presence of prey or predators in my environment. My vision was adequate although not sharp, and allowed me to track movement. Some of us had infrared-sensitive receptors in deep grooves on the snout to be able to see warm-blooded mammals who preyed on us or who we preyed on in the darkest of nights. Our body in direct contact with the ground was very sensitive to vibration and we sensed other animals approaching by detecting faint vibrations in the air and on the ground. 

Our skin was covered by overlapping scales. The scales on our belly gripped the ground allowing us to crawl and creep. We shed our scales by crawling out of our old skin as if turning a sock inside out. Our old and worn skin was replaced and parasites such as mites and ticks were gotten rid of like discarding old clothes. When young and still growing, we shed our skin up to four times a year. When we got older, we did it only once or twice a year.

We reproduced by copulating. The males inserted their penises into the vaginas of the females and ejaculated their sperm to fertilize the eggs. Most females abandoned their eggs shortly after laying. Some who lived in cold environments retained their eggs within their bodies until they were almost ready to hatch.

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